The sales are what God created on the 8th day, to make the horrible equation of ‘wanting + buying = 20p noodles for the rest of the month’ easier on us all, probably after spending his rest day looking at clothes he couldn’t afford. The smug thrill of getting something with a major fist-bump discount is an emotion so amazing that it can only be topped by telling people about it. LN-CC has long been a favourite of mine for menswear and is always my first go-to during the sales, particularly as it means I can shop from the comfort of my freezing office rather than dragging my sweating, harrassed, afro’d corpse around actual shops. Here’s my pick of the best of the current sale stock:
Ahhh bonjour ma petite tasse! Regardez-vous ma blog post de Paris Fashion Week! As you can tell, I’m basically fluent in French, it’s one of my many talents. For those not as clever as me at French, here’s a round-up of the sartorial offerings from Paris Fashion Week.
STOP. BALMAIN TIME! An 80s wipe-clean wonderland, Balmain was every theatrical tin-foil fashion hope and more, we have Balmain in at my work all the time, can’t wait to try and shoe-horn myself into the amazing waistcoat outfit on the right, rip it, and be evicted because I can’t pay for it. ASPIRATIONAL!
Alexander Wang’s much anticipated first collection since his controversial appointment at Balenciaga. And it wasn’t horrible. It’s still very much Wang-esque (not a word I’ll use again, promise) but with undeniable Christobal influence. I liked it, it’s a nice return to the classic, clean Balenciaga, rather than the ultra modernism Ghesquiere brought with his metal leggings/Egyptofunk/riding hats etc, which I loved, but I don’t think Wang could have followed on from or replicated in the same vein without it looking like some kind of shit Project Runway ~modernism~ challenge.
I know leather panelling has been done over and over and over, but I want this, all of this, and variations of this, forever.
Really enjoying the Brave New World/Handmaid’s Tale minimal ~dystopian sexuality~ here, and how could I not love the wimple. I’m all about a wimple. I’m not ususally a huge fan of Mugler, but the simplicity, and the murky blue with crisp white, speaks to my inner future gimp.
Each season Givenchy is usually my go-to, but the disparity between the menswear (99% of the time, amazing) and the womenswear (67% of the time, amazing) starts to show more and more. I love the floral leather biker and the quilted bomber, super, but the random sequinned arm? The cheap ill-fitting mesh? The shiny polka-dots? This both confuses and upsets me.
These are my dream outfits until I’m thin enough to slip under my office door, rather than walking through it. Probably not very practical day to day (getting closed in bus doors, dropping Tesco Value lasagne down yourself, cycling – all trials I face daily) but commanding and beautiful all the same. I do miss the structured, body-con Pugh of olde, but a shift in silhouette hasn’t lost the dark drama he’s built his brand on.
I’m not ususally a fan of Valentino, not nearly enough black, leather or androgyny for me, but this china plate-esque collection has reminded me that I AM A GIRL, HERE ME SQUEAL!
Do you feel dizzy? Disorientated? It might be to do with Yves Saint Laurent spinning so hard in his grave that the Earth is turning faster than usual. #SOFTGRUNGELAURENT HAS STRUCK AGAIN. Hedi’s latest collection (and we know how much I enjoyed his last menswear offering) has been met with a resounding NON from critics, and rightly so. His access to the Topshop throw-out must be STOPPED.
This season marks Claire Wright Keller’s fourth at the helm of Chloe, and it’s definitely her best yet. Probably my favourite collection from Paris, simple and minimal with great tailoring and a perfect colour palette.
Who invented the tartan laundry bag? Has anyone got his email? He’s definitely been ripped off at Celine. Blatant plagiarism aside, Celine was it’s usual super self, a really nice palette and pleasing oversized yet tailored shapes (so excited to put on 15 stone before winter and be able to shop at Celine rather than Millets!).